6-23-08 Another new Monday

June 23, 2008

I notice that the way I stop journalling is not by stopping, but by dwindling off; letting the frequency fade.
The only time I kept somwhat steadily to my journal was the three years I spent exploring my spiri9tuality.  Of course, I haven’t finished.  I never will. 

I consciously stop myself, spending my time on “the 10,000 things.”  I rationalize that I can’t separate the ONE from the 10,000…unlike George Carlin who separated the 7 from the 100,000.  We will miss him – though he believed in the 7, not the ONE – Now he knows.

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June 3, 2008 Intention

June 3, 2008

Hard to distinguish intention from vision, goal, mission,…  All of these words have a role in propelling us to the future…and sometimes I think the difference is in my mood.  What it looks like today is that my intention is motivating me to stop this and start that, to get on with it.

My intention is to focus on my income potential… so this looks like indulgence – It’s taken a while to babysit with Camron, cook and eat breakfast and break away from today’s book.  So I’m behind.  Have to pass over my email and get going.  Money distracts me and I have to undistract.  Always helps to restate my commitments-bringing joy and satisfaction to people’s lives – in harmony with Earth; environmental sustainability, social justice and spiritual fulfillment to all.


May 30, 2008 Falling Short

May 30, 2008

I have to ask what I intend with this.  I no longer write every day; I’ll have to get a WIFI, so I’ve fallen short of that intention.  And I have to confess that I don’t even know why I do this… some peculiar form of stubborn.  I think I’ll stop


May 29, 2008 One More Time

May 29, 2008

Our youngest, Ariel, gave birth yesterday shortly after 4AM to a lovely boy, un-named as of this writing…a natural childbirth.  She will be home tomorrow.  She had to fill out all sorts of forms because she won’t allow any vaccinations.

He is my 8th, and likely last grandchild.  I’ve been very laid back about him, but as I write various friends I realize how excited I really am.  There’s something in that – how sharing with others reveals you to yourself.

So in this year so far, our youngest daughter Ariel has given birth, Sunny, our oldest – because of Aliya’s love – is moving to a house of her own.  I tell you, her yard is the yard of a million dollar home and the home is in Hamilton, near an excellent school.  And my now next older grandson is almost 8 months old – He talks with me all the time.

When you have family like that, nothing else matter.  We are blessed One More Time.  I am secure in my commitments – to a sustainable planet, to social justice and to spiritual fulfillment.


May 27, 2008 Summer?

May 27, 2008

Memorial Day has always ben considered the unofficial start of summer.  But can that be May 27 pr is it still June 1.  I get confused.  Are the pools open?

Anyhow, it’s back to work.  I’ve been really lazy these last few days – even ignoring this.  I’ve had my fill of old war movies and basketball.  PBS had an airing of Truman, starring Harry Truman, not Jim Carrey.  His maturation was extraordinary… particularly when you realize that the A-bomb was only the first of his critical decisions and he has grown large in history.  … larger when you contrast him with (shudder) Bush.

I’m still not back.  That’s clear.

 


It’s too nice

May 27, 2008

It’s too nice

and I don’t trust it
i’ve become a cynic

I just walked Camron
just around the block
I sweat; it’s pretty
it’s pretty and nice
and I don’t trust it
i’ve become a cynic

I remember longing
for days like this
hearing music on the street
rolling Camron to the beat
walking slow
seeing summer coam around
it’s really nice
and I don’t trust it
Like George Bush saying something right
and turning day into a long night
I don’t trust it
i’ve become a cynic,
afraid of beauty
afraid of this one’s
new tomorrow
afraid of beauty
sowing sorrow

knowing that i’m silly
not embracing what is, what’s now;
the devil take tomorrow
I can deal with sorrow
when it comes
why bother with it now
why bother with it now
why bother with it now


May 26, 2008 Happy? Monday

May 27, 2008

This is about contradiction.  There’s no work.  There’s no school.  It’s a perfect day; temperature 80+, cloudless sky, just the right breeze.  And it’s memorial day.  Be happy.  Remember the dead, the brave, the sacrificed.  Watch war memories on television with the windows open.

How do we be on a day like this?

Here’s how I am.  Happy, playing with happy grandchildren, being outside.  Praying the war will end — everywhere, praying for us to build our future, not destroy it — saying what I want, writing poems.  Being grateful for what we have, for what works, for today.

Going for a walk.